when a lady said yes. she actually meant no.

Friday, December 23, 2005

at this ungodly hour and having only 2 hours of sleep i'm actually up and about ALREADY. haha. ((:

and i have work later at 1pm and meeting joanne at 11am. *shakes head*

one day, i swear my body is going to go against me. ((:

i'm sensing sore throat now. blame yourself please mr wu.

had fun the past 3 days. would like more of it please.

((:

christmas! like finally. haha. so who's getting me gifts. please let me know. cause for obvious reasons, i need to get you one too. hurhur.

working 24hour shift tomorrow. i want to go MoS please. )): such bummer.

christmas exchange gift tomorrow. haha. yay! ((:

i want to stand under the mistletoe. do you? ((:

but i rather stand under a sunflower. like seriously. haha. ((:

good morning world.

7:28 AM_______ .

Monday, December 19, 2005

i'm tired. and it doesn't help that i'm not sleepy. )):

and these cramps. an add-on bonus to my already miserable peachy life. haiz.

mama's nagging cause i'm supposed to be sleeping.

i can't wait for tomorrow cause finally i have my much awaited off days. ((: i need it like how dolphins need the sea to survive. hurhur. i like dolphins. don't you?

i think i should go sleep. ((:

if i ask you, you, you to stay and stand by me, how many of yous would actually stay and stand by me?

if i ask you, you, you to stay and make me smile and laugh, how many of yous would actually stay and make me smile and laugh?

if i ask you, you, you to stay and just listen, how many of yous would actually stay and just listen to me?

if i ask you, you, you to go and leave, how many of yous would actually leave and then turn back to stand by me, again?

i'm tired. physically and mentally.

i'm switching off. so shoos.

11:56 AM_______ .

Sunday, December 18, 2005

i actually thought that tonight, yes, sunday night was going to be my final boo-ness shift. )):

unfortunately, its not meant to be.

)):

but its okays i guess. cause i'm loving it. ((:

not cause of the minimal amount of work to do, haha, but cause santa comes in the shape of edmund yong delivering prata to me. ((:

xx

super drunk (haha) and awfully tired edmund came by this morning with prata for me and my colleagues. how sweetness is that. ((:

and we added each other on msn over at business centre. took pictures which i won't bother asking from him cause i look awful in uniform and will never post any of it. NEVER. until the day when i'm ready, which i doubt will be anytime soon. haha. ((:

maybe i'm not good at feigning shock. but doesn't that makes sense? i wasn't faking it. i was really pleasantly genuinely surprised. ((:

thanks edmund. you know very well you're very very much appreciated. ((:

xx

had dinner with zaki at i-won't-even-bother-saying-where. haha. i very much believe that everyone knows where i go for dinner before work. haha. ((:

and this guy, he made me wait. he MADE me WAIT. *rolls eyes*

note to self: never make dates on 17 december. especially with a certain mr zek.

and pictures will be up as soon as i got the pictures from his truly.

xx

i want to club. and dance. and grind. hurhur. and do whats-nots.

basically. i want to PARTY! i don't mind even if its dancing under the void deck or drinking ribena with coke. or singing in the toilet. i really don't.

just bring me out of this norm straight road. its been a long journey please. its almost tiring.

its been 8357438623124647438 years can. )): like really super sad face here can.

anyways, i won't go with edmund. cause he'll get drunk and puke everywhere. even despite the fact that he sent me home in one piece all the way to my door step in that drunken state.

haha. i enjoy refreshing his memory on this unfortunately happy incident. ((: haha.

xx

i'm not all that happy today.

i was at work when i thought i saw her. so what if we're not even related? so what if all that were history. she made miserable for 2 months. and its enough for me to hate her.

she made me insecure. and is still making me very unconfident of myself.

i'm not happy that she's coming back soon. )):

i need my knight in shining armor please.

xx

people. please make me smile cans? cause i'm tired. of making myself hehe-ing and haha-ing.

can't you see its all a facade?

maybe i should just stand in the corner after all. )):

xx

i'm tired. i want to sleep.

good night world.

9:40 AM_______ .

Friday, December 16, 2005

i have yet to get my full dosage of sleep.

cause my happy mama was happily having her happy hours now. (read: karaoke) *ROLLS EYES*

and i only slept at 11am this morning! cause people at work insists that i make myself very very tired and try to keep myself awake till after 11am. and i listened to them. very obedient. ((:

at 11am sharp, i'm off to lala land. haha.

the 2nd day of this midnight shift was much better then the first. haha. at least i'm sane this time round. cause yesterday at 5am i was already spreading myself presentably across the counter. haha.

but this time round, at 5am i was actually playing hide-and-seek with the ants on the counter. oh. were those imaginary ants?

and after work yesterday i went to the mango sale which started at 8am. and i was super shocked to actually see a crowd.

hello? 8am? sleep?

in edmund's words.

tell a girl to meet at 7pm and she'll reach at 8pm.

tell a girl there's a sale at 8am and she'll reach by 7am.

haha. haha. i so can relate to the first part.

second part. its pretty normal to go shopping at 8am after your ghostly shift. haha. ((: so that's not me. cause i'll choose sleep over anything. haha. ((:

but yesterday i was so tired to even browse through whats left of the rummaged clothes.

i walked in the store. got pushed about. and then i left. hurhur.

i was really really stoning can.

and i seriously thought i could have the whole mango store for myself. ((: haha. and boy was i very wrong.

haha. women. can never figure them out. haha. double haha.

anyways. today was different. when the 7am staff came by, i greeted them with christmas carols. and they actually thought i was high on panadols. just cause that's the only drugs in the vicinity.

do panadols even make you high?

and now i lost track of time. i can't figure yesterday to being which day of the week.

was it friday? or saturday? and now? friday?

i'm lost.

am i blabbering? i think i am. and i think i should go back to bed.

anyways something belated.

i thought i better post this before the next public holiday. haha. ((:

6:04 PM_______ .

Thursday, December 15, 2005

my first midnight shift. i had no idea it was going to relatively taxing and mentally exhausting. and i know i should continue sleeping and not up and about now.

so anyways. last night and very very early this morning i was a pampered bitch. ((: i never felt so whoa before. and its people like you guys that make me feel so lucky.

i'll tell you why.

first things first. ((:

met edmund for dinner. supposedly at 6.30pm. i managed to push the time to 7pm. and i arrived fashionably late at 7.45pm. ((: but he's nice about it. he even picked me up from where he found me. haha.

we had breeks at my demand. haha. i'm demanding. i know. ((: but i like breeks! loads. ((: and its near where i'm working. so? still want to argue? haha. ((:

i love my lasagne but i love his N8800 more. grr.

its okays. since i'm getting my v3 razr PINK phone in 2 weeks time? please! please come by then! i need my pink razr phone! by the way, i'm not materialistic. just superficial. haha.

we ate and he sent me to work. so sweet right. ((:

and then. yes the happy part. ((: after i changed, and getting ready for work. guess who i saw. mr edmund yong. okay okay. very expected. haha. but he actually made a roundabout okays.

he handed me a box of chocolate with a very very sweet note APOLOGISING to me. yes apologised to me for the fact that there are no more brownies left. aww. like uber sweetness can. ((:

((: this guy made me happy. at least for the first part of the night. haha.

cause i had another surprise at 3.30am in the morning. haha. ((:

mr wu. ((:

mr wu called when i'm having my break. and i had to leave victor all by himself in the staff canteen and made a mad rush back up. ((:

mr wu got me supper. prata. and i was just complaining to victor bout the lousy canteen food and he was advising me to bring my own food in future when suddenly mr wu appeared with good food. like super uber sweetness can! and its 3.30am!!!

okays. minus the fact that he was from merry-making and dancing and drinking and i hate him. haha.

and its during these classic moments that never fails to make feel like a lucky girl. and its them that makes me feel like i'm always loved by friends. haha. very cliche right. okays. okays. i know. i know. this is the part where i go fRieNds fOreVeR~ hahaha. ((:

lala. lala. wee~

you'll know when i'm in my happy mood. ((:

okay. now. despite the fact that i am still very tired and sleepy, i'm going to have a shower. and off to my appointments. and yes. meeting joanne too. ((:

edmund is so going to have to wait again. haha.

i'm a happy bitch.

and this so super overloaded cuteness.

5:43 PM_______ .

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

to all you people who's going dancing and merry-making tonight, i wish you'd fell and sprain your leg, hit your head and left to sit by the roadside trying to find your identity.

and zouk will close again for another night of renovation and momo is only open for 31 years old and above.

yes. i'm cursing you. for not bringing me along.

GO AND DANCE YOUR NIGHT AWAY FOR ALL I CARE!

okay okay. i know i know.

i hate my job. *sour grapes*

*ROLLS EYES*

4:28 PM_______ .

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

did i mention how busy i was the past 5 days? i was. haha.

birthdays, birthdays and many more birthdays to come. *ROLLS EYES*

i'm celebrating my birthday tomorrow people.

i don't care. everyday's my birthday. ((:

xx

nad's birthday! cam-whoring. lava lamp. jeff. ((: lucky girl!

no pictures due to a certain human being who refuse to go online and send me the pictures. ((:

xx

pin xin's birthday!

old friends. strawberry cake. cam-whoring. costa sands. mahjong. jockey cap. rafferty's bike. city hall. hurhur. butt very pain can. ((: balloons. happiness. ((:

xx

john little sale! expo. disappointed. train ride. burger king. mr wu. sis. buzz. nice-ness! ((:

and by the way mr wu, your pictures are up. like happy now? this is one vain ex-cjc *roll eyes* guy who insists his pictures to be put up.

xx

geraldine's birthday!

mango cake! i like! haha. cam-whoring! (what's new) i-dog. haha. ((: flowers! no sunflowers. haha. mr wu being miss wu. haha. haha. so funny can. late night movie! saw II. gross. terry's bike. comfy. haha. ((:

xx

nini's birthday!

fish & co! yummy. prezzies. surprise 1. surprise 2. surprise 3! faidz! stand on chair. birthday song. climbing up and down. exposed! ginny babe! ((: cam-whoring. haha. balcony. no more virgin. drink. drank. never drunk. ((: christmas deco!

xx

mr wu's place. kung fu hustle. no subtitles. DVD. grr. haha. and i like this part. i watched the movie. he did his work. haha. glasses. nice-ness! ((: whiteboard. mirror. ((: slept over. handphone. irritating! gabriel!! grr. haha. comfy. wee-ness. ((:

xx

home at noon with mr wu. brunch. ((: showered. bugis. mama. shopping. hehe. haha. ((: shorts. bags. necklace. ooh-wee. westmall. m1. starhub. razr v3 pink phone! 3 MORE WEEKS! grr!

xx

and today. i'm going back to work. )):

and this week i'll be doing the graveyard shift too. oh wells.

xx

and now i'm broke with 4 more birthdays to go. 1 anniversary. 1 festive seaoson.

too many birthdays makes the babe a cash-less girl. )):

and now i can't go shopping.

xx

and yes!

happy birthday zaki!

another december baby.

xx

i heart my october.

and tomorrow is still my birthday. ((:

10:47 AM_______ .

Monday, December 12, 2005

i finally acted out the final chapter of my book. and has since closed it to be kept away.

xx

mama asked questions and was very very kind to me. she did not say "i told you so" or "it's about time". she didn't. and that's the reason why i feel like crying out loud now.

she even made a joke out of the whole situation. and it warms me despite the fact that i'm angry at her. for making me want to bawl out right there in kfc in front of my chicken and spoiling my appetite. *rolls eyes*

such a good place to have a heart-to-heart talk right. NOT!

finally. she knows. ((:

her say on this?

never to hurt anyone during this rebound period of mine. ((:

mama. i love you. and thanks for being you. ((:

xx

and now. to you.

its been a month. how are you? ((:

it wasn't easy on me. and i know its hard on you too. ((: i am taking it slowly. and i know you'll be fine too given the time.

the dreams we once shared will have to be erased off and to make space for new ones.

despite the fact that we've been through a great deal together, we can't deny the fact that the future is bleak for us. separation is the only ideal way out for us. whether we like it or not. ((: and no i don't blame you. i believe there's a reason to all of these. ((:

i'm glad we parted on good terms. ((: and the fact that we're still friends.

so dear friend, thank you for the time spent together the past years and the wonderful memories that we shared. the lessons we learn from each other are very valuable to me and i hope it is to you too. ((:

so now. i take my final bow. and till i see you again? ((:

you still have 293559345 stuff with me which i think you'll need them. haha.

its nice to know that i was once loved by you. and that, to me is more than enough. ((:

thank you. ((:

xx

janet jackson - again

i heard from a friend today and
she said you were in town
suddenly the memories came back
to me in my mind

how can i be strong i've asked myself
time and time i've said
that i'll never fall in love with you again

a wounded heart you gave
my soul you took away
good intentions you had many
i know you did
i come from a place that hurts
god knows how i've cried
and i never want to return
never fall again

making love to you felt so good
and oh so right
how can i be strong i've asked myself
time and time i've said
that i'll never fall in love with you again

so here we are alone again
didn't think it'd come to this
and to know it all began
with just a little kiss
i've come too close to happiness
to have it swept away
don't think i can take the pain
never fall again

kinda late in the game
and my heart is in your hands
don't you stand there and then tell me
you love me
then leave again
cause i'm falling in love with you again

hold me, hold me
don't ever let me go
say it just one time
say you love me
god knows i do love you again

8:33 PM_______ .

Friday, December 09, 2005

i am living a life filled with love, fun, peace, laughter and joy.

i guess.

haha.

xx

i am so loving my room.

despite the fact that i have clothes everywhere in the room. magazines on the bed. papers around my computer table. make up and accessories on my counter. pillows everywhere except on the bed.

i was never a neat girl. in fact i never AM. and very likely, will never be one. *shrugs* ((:

but i'm loving the room anyways cause its nicely scented with my fragrant oil in my new bunsen burner. haha. i like my bunsen burner. really. a gift from the babes. which i am really so loving it. ((:

so what if the scent is not those therapeutic ones like say, lavender? i like my passion fruit. and so what if i'm drowning in the scent? at least i drowned in a nice smelling room. ((:

xx

i am so hating december.

cause i have to spend alot of ka-ching.

birthday gifts. christmas gifts. new year's eve party.

up to date i have 8 coming birthdays. with one already down. which reminds me, happy birthday nad. haha. ((:

and of course that annual year end sale, christmas sale, post christmas sale.

i'm so going to start my new year with a very empty pocket. *GROANS*

xx

i am very likely going to hate work!

cause they are going to pay us on the 19th and the rest of my otherwise big fat pay next year!!!

and it doesn't help that its DECEMBER! and i SHOULD get at least my full pay NOW!

i don't mind those bonus. okay. i do mind. why can't they just give us the full month pay together with bonus and that other extra cash.

*ROLLS EYES*

otherwise i am still loving my job. ((:

xx

and i have work at 7am tomorrow. thank god dearest papa agreed to send me to work. i need to be pampered please. i've been taking care of myself the past 3 weeks. please. i need some TLC please.

no. i need loads. and i really mean loads of TLC please. ((:

xx

yesterday's meet up session with the babes was fun. despite the uber tired-ness. haha.

love the cam-whoring moments. though surprisingly not many.

and that open up session with janna babe on the bus. ((: do you even know you made me feel 294565936kg lighter? even after i ate that super sinful chocolate cake. which i am definitely going back for more. ((:

xx

i want to be star struck please.

xx

above all that. my life is still very much filled with love, fun, peace laughter and joy

hurhur.

12:16 AM_______ .

Saturday, December 03, 2005

christmas is coming. ((:

and i'm told to make a wish.

and guess what. i already have one. ((:

new year will be up next.

and once again, i'm asked to make a wish.

and then i realised that i don't have one.

i have a gazillion.

haha. ((:

anyways. can i have my christmas gift?

i've been good this year. ((:

really.

11:51 PM_______ .

11:39 PM_______ .

Friday, December 02, 2005

mr wu is the bimbotic new age guy. ((:

and very chicken little too. haha. ((:

1:00 AM_______ .